HUGE DORK ACCEPTED INTO MENSA

ST. PAUL, MN - Another huge dork was accepted today into the high-IQ society known as Mensa.
34-year-old parking garage attendant, Peter Lawton, received his letter from Mensa in the mail today, officially announcing his acceptance into the group for intelligent, yet socially-inept, people.
“This is splendid,” said Lawton. “For years, I thought I was merely a dork. But now the truth has been revealed: I am a brilliant dork.”
Lawton went on to say that he couldn’t wait to attend his first meeting, where he plans on using the word “recalcitrance” in a game of Scrabble, and discussing the pros and cons of quantum physics.