I AIN'T THAT BABY'S DADDY!

Look, Maury. I ain't messed with Dakeisha in a long time. We was livin' together wit her momma, but she kicked me out back in December, because she a ho! We ain't messed around since Kwanzza!
Yo, I know that's still enough time for this ugly *beep* kid to be mine, but it could be anyone's! She be tossin' that *beep* up fo' everyone in the neighborhood-- the mailman, the 'lectrician, Reverend Carter,.. even her daddy! I come home one night, and they was all on the duvet, gettin' all Jodeci and *beep*. I was like, "Damn! That's sick, fo' real!" I wouldn't be surprised if this baby was retarded!
Naw,.. don't even try that, Maury. Don't even try that. He don't even look like me. I'm brown. He sepia! I got hair. He don't. I got a job. He don't. That how you know he ain't mine. That baby look gay, too.
I don't keeyir. I'll take yo *beep* paternity test. I'll show you that Dakeisha a ho! Dakeisha a ho, and I ain't that baby father!
That's what I'm sayin'.