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vol 7 - issue 04 (dec 2004) :: stories
BRITNEY'S POETRY CORNER
Five quick poems by guest poet submitter, Britney Spears

GOD, YOU'RE COOL

God, God, oh, God

You are the bomb

You are not dumb

I like to chew gum

Oh my God

That actually rhymed




SO, LIKE, UM... YEAH

So, like, um... yeah

Like... um

Yeah... you know?

So, ah... like

Like, right, right?

Sure




ONE TIME I WENT TO A ZOO

I saw a monkey

And a donkey

It was a good time

But they wouldn't let me ride on the train

They said it was for kids only

Don't they fucking know who I am?!?

I'm goddamn Britney Spears!

I can buy you and your whole family, you trash!

Fuckers!




FRED DURST & JUSTIN TIMBERLAKE

Freddie and Justin

You may think you used me

But I used both of you, you jerks!

And even though I let you put it in my butt

Doesn't mean I'm, like, you know, a whore or nothing

Right?

Right?




MOMMY, CAN YOU READ ME A BOOK?

Mommy, will you please read me this book?

It made no sense to me when I gave it a look

It's confusing and weird and it is very scary

I can't make out what it is saying to me... ah, Barry

Oh. I was trying to read a book of stamps.

Never mind.

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