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vol 8 - issue 05 (jan 2006) :: entertainmental
2005 TOP TEN: VINNIE-STYLE!
What Vinnie Baggadonuts was all about in 2005!
With a special appearance by Dubya!

Vinnie: Hey, Dubya. What's happenin'?

Dubya: Nothin'. Makin' money... talkin' on my cell phone.

Vinnie: No you aren't. You're talking into a tennis ball.

Dubya: Right. Listen. Every year you tree-huggers talk about your favorite music from the past year. This year, I want in on the action.

Vinnie: Uh, okay. Do you have a list of CDs?

Dubya: Nope. Can I use yours? I'll give you a defense contract.

Vinnie: Word! Let's split 'em.

VON IVA - VON IVA EP
Dubya: Sounds German!
Vinnie: It's not. It's American.
Dubya: "Von" is a weird first name for a dude.
Vinnie: "Von Iva" is the last name of the lead singer.
Dubya: Is he German?
Vinnie: He's a "she".
Dubya: God frowns upon that.
Vinnie: (sighs)

GORILLAZ - DEMON DAYS
Vinnie: This is my favorite record this year.
Dubya: Because monkeys made it?
Vinnie: No. Because there's not one bad song on it. I never skip any of the tracks when I listen to the album.
Dubya: Man, those are some amazing monkeys.

M.I.A. - ARULAR
Dubya: What's "arular" mean?

Vinnie: I don’t think it's a real word. At least not an English one.
Dubya: They're foreigners?
Vinnie: She's a foreigner.
Dubya: Is she German?
Vinnie: No.
Dubya: Did she used to be a dude?
Vinnie: No! Where do you get this shit?!?

DANGER DOOM - THE MASK AND THE MOUSE
Dubya: I love Disney.
Vinnie: What?
Dubya: The mouse.
Vinnie: It's not Mickey Mouse; it’s DJ Danger Mouse. He was on that Gorillaz record, too.
Dubya: So he knows the musical baboons?
Vinnie: Monkeys-- Gorillaz! Fuck, this is exhausting!

13 & GOD - 13 & GOD
Dubya: Now this is more my speed!
Vinnie: You like Anticon?
Dubya: What? No. I like God.
Vinnie: Oh brother.... Uh, half the musicians are German, you know.
Dubya: Sweet Lord inside me! Do they know that Von Iva guy-girl?
Vinnie: She’s not a guy-girl. She’s just a girl. A very attractive girl.
Dubya: God frowns upon you saying that.
Vinnie: That I like girls?
Dubya: Who used to be dudes.

KANYE WEST - LATE REGISTRATION
Dubya: No way. Get this off the list. I am not endorsing someone who goes on national television and says I hate black people!

Vinnie: Then I will.

DEF HARMONIC - ALL THESE WORLDZ
Dubya: They spelled "deaf" wrong. Even I know that.
Vinnie: They did it on purpose. Same with "worldz".
Dubya: What’s wrong with "worldz"?
Vinnie: Can we talk about what’s good about the records?
Dubya: Do you think they know the rock 'n' roll orangutans?

COMMON - BE
Dubya: Is that backwards?
Vinnie: What?
Dubya: Shouldn’t it be, "be common"?
Vinnie: That's it. I’m finished.
Dubya: But this is a top-ten list! We still have four more to go!


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