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vol 8 - issue 05 (jan 2006) :: entertainmental
2005 TOP TEN: WAYNE-STYLE!
What Wayne Chinsang was all about in 2005!
Illustrated by Wayne, too!

Yay! Itís that time of year again when I let all of you squares know what the top ten albums of the past year were! Of course, you may have your own opinion of what should be on this list, but letís get serious here: is the world waiting with bated breath for your list? I didnít think so. The only thing that is more anticipated than my list every year is the announcement of which tramp will win on that gutter slut Tyra Banks' gay reality show, Americaís Next Top Hooker.

In no particular order, here are ten albums that came out in 2005 that I think are damn keen, along with a few extras thrown in for good measure.

SHARON JONES AND THE DAP-KINGS - NATURALLY
Seven fellas and one sultry sexpot known as Sharon Jones create heartfelt soul that could easily have been created over three decades ago. Not only is this guitar- and horn-laced album one of the best of the year, itís also the sexiest of the year.

GENERAL PATTON VS. THE X-ECUTIONERS - GENERAL PATTON VS. THE X-ECUTIONERS
What do you get when you cross the creative genius that is Mike Patton with three masters of the wheels of steel? One of the most layered and eclectic picks to date. This disc is just dripping with experimentation, and I hope they decide to do another.

BOURBON PRINCESS - DARK OF DAYS
Deeper than Atlantis and darker than Ted Danson in blackface, Dark Of Days is the perfect music for you to listen to while making really slow and kinky love to someone special. Or for when youíre killing them in the middle of the night.

MIKE DOUGHTY - HAUGHTY MELODIC
Iíve always had a warm place in my heart (awww...) for Mike Doughty. Fuck those that thought the death of his earlier band, Soul Coughing, would be the end of him. This album proves that Mike will continue to do what he does best no matter what the circumstances may be.

Z-TRIP - SHIFTING GEARS
You ever have an album that you really love, but then you just kind of forget about it for awhile because life gets crazy, but then you put it back in your player when youíre trying to come up with your "best of" list for the January issue and it totally blows you away with how good it is, and then you hate yourself for forgetting about it and not listening to it more? Yeah. Thatís this album.

ZZZ - SOUND OF ZZZ
These two kids from Amsterdam make more music than an entire orchestra! What I really loved about this album was that I couldnít really compare their sound to anyone else out there. Iíll just say this: buy this album and play it as loud as your stereo will let you. You wonít be disappointed.

GENERAL ELEKTRIKS - CLIQUETY KLIQK
Frenchie Brit R.V. Salters is the lone ranger responsible for this, the most catchy and fun album of the year. It reminds me of some of Fatboy Slimís earlier work, but less repetitive. This is just one of those albums that everyone loves. Havenít met a soul yet that canít not tap their foot to it.

THE OLD SCRATCH REVIVAL SINGERS - OH, DIDN'T HE RAMBLE
I only received this on vinyl-- which is cool because I do have a player-- but Iíd really love to get the CD. This album is just filled with dreary dirge-like tunes that will make you think they were recorded a hundred years ago.

THE BUDOS BAND - THE BUDOS BAND
In the same vein as Fela Kuti and Antibalas comes The Budos Band. Primarily instrumental, this jazz- and Afrobeat-influenced group fills your ears with almost more music than your brain can process. And the best part is that itís funky as can be. Definitely one to shake your ass to.

ANDREW BIRD - ANDREW BIRD AND THE MYSTERIOUS PRODUCTION OF EGGS
Iím sure Night Watchman already has this disc covered, but it does deserve a second mention. I first heard this disc in the tattoo parlor where Iím getting some work done, and before I even knew who it was, I instantly fell in love with it. Itís somewhat of a departure from Birdís earlier work that I was familiar with, but itís a musical evolution that is much-appreciated. And Iím naming "A Nervous Tic Motion Of The Head To The Left" as best song of the year.

AND THREE HONORABLE MENTIONS:

DA WHOLE THING - DA WHOLE THING @ VERSION CITY
This amazing disc was actually recorded years and years ago, and thanks to the bandís own Patrick Carayannis, Vinnie and I have been rocking out to it since then. But because of lame labels and the fact that a majority of the public likes shit, it didnít get officially released until this past year. But Iím not bitter or nothing.

NINE INCH NAILS - WITH TEETH
I have always loved Nine Inch Nails. Always will. So Iím admittedly biased when it comes to their newest release. Adding With Teeth to my top ten would be like Vinnie adding The Slackers to his list. Or Mariah Carey.

BECK - GUERO
Beck is much like Nails for me, but thatís not why I canít add him to my list. I canít add him to my list because weíre related. Itís true. Weíre cousins. Our mothers are sisters. Okay, thatís not true. Itís really because of the first reason I mentioned.


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