admin
22 December 2023
Franklin,
Recently I was at one of those meat market type places here in town, and one of the guys who worked there kept trying to grab my ass. I asked him to stop, but he wouldn’t. So I had sex with him in the bathroom just to get him off my back. Later, one of my girlfriends said I was a whore. Now, I’ve never been one to harbor an original idea. I’ve followed every major clothing trend based on a movie. I’ve bought every product my television has ever told me to. I’ve used every popular slang word ad nauseam in a vain effort to be considered \"cool\" by my equally shallow friends. I’ve become so caught up in what others think of me, I don’t even think I know myself anymore; and now people are calling me a whore. Could they be right?
Leah Birmingham
Leah,
First off, grocery shopping is the only time I recommend staying away from those mom and pop type places. Corporate grocery stores have a strict set of guidelines for their employees. If anyone in their meat department tried getting fresh with you, they would be let go immediately. I would go into this further and discuss the bounty of delicacies found in my grocer’s freezer, but I suspect this letter is fraudulent. How many whores know the term “ad nauseam”, or how to almost properly use a semi-colon? How probable is it that someone like the person described above would have a moment of clarity so sharp that they might see the error of their own ways? Leah, if that is your real name, I would seek counseling and try to figure out who you really are. If this letter was not written by Leah, but by some happy-go-lucky wonder-boy seeking out some cyber-jollies, then I ask that the author be filled with shame. This is a forum for people to discuss their problems so that they may learn and grow. This is not some sort of flim-flam game designed for one’s own personal amusement.
Franklin,
Sometimes, when I am bored at work, I think about fornicating with my girlfriend. Is this normal?
Feeling Guilty in Clintonville,
Lew Graves
Lew,
At first I thought your question was fairly idiotic. I mean, of course it is normal to desire one’s own girlfriend. Then I got to thinking, yes it is normal, but is it really fair to your employer? I think not. You are dishonestly using company time, cheating them out of the salary they have agreed to pay you. While dreaming about your girlfriend, your fellow employees may incorrectly think you are dwelling over complex financial matters. The only solution is to freely pleasure yourself in front of the water cooler while verbalizing your desires. Your company realizes you are human, and they are sure to understand your shortcomings as such. Anything less than the complete truth would be a disservice to your employer.
HAVING PROBLEMS WITH MATTERS OF YOUR HEART? EMAIL FRANKLIN HERE FOR ALL THE ANSWERS.
Recently I was at one of those meat market type places here in town, and one of the guys who worked there kept trying to grab my ass. I asked him to stop, but he wouldn’t. So I had sex with him in the bathroom just to get him off my back. Later, one of my girlfriends said I was a whore. Now, I’ve never been one to harbor an original idea. I’ve followed every major clothing trend based on a movie. I’ve bought every product my television has ever told me to. I’ve used every popular slang word ad nauseam in a vain effort to be considered \"cool\" by my equally shallow friends. I’ve become so caught up in what others think of me, I don’t even think I know myself anymore; and now people are calling me a whore. Could they be right?
Leah Birmingham
Leah,
First off, grocery shopping is the only time I recommend staying away from those mom and pop type places. Corporate grocery stores have a strict set of guidelines for their employees. If anyone in their meat department tried getting fresh with you, they would be let go immediately. I would go into this further and discuss the bounty of delicacies found in my grocer’s freezer, but I suspect this letter is fraudulent. How many whores know the term “ad nauseam”, or how to almost properly use a semi-colon? How probable is it that someone like the person described above would have a moment of clarity so sharp that they might see the error of their own ways? Leah, if that is your real name, I would seek counseling and try to figure out who you really are. If this letter was not written by Leah, but by some happy-go-lucky wonder-boy seeking out some cyber-jollies, then I ask that the author be filled with shame. This is a forum for people to discuss their problems so that they may learn and grow. This is not some sort of flim-flam game designed for one’s own personal amusement.
Franklin,
Sometimes, when I am bored at work, I think about fornicating with my girlfriend. Is this normal?
Feeling Guilty in Clintonville,
Lew Graves
Lew,
At first I thought your question was fairly idiotic. I mean, of course it is normal to desire one’s own girlfriend. Then I got to thinking, yes it is normal, but is it really fair to your employer? I think not. You are dishonestly using company time, cheating them out of the salary they have agreed to pay you. While dreaming about your girlfriend, your fellow employees may incorrectly think you are dwelling over complex financial matters. The only solution is to freely pleasure yourself in front of the water cooler while verbalizing your desires. Your company realizes you are human, and they are sure to understand your shortcomings as such. Anything less than the complete truth would be a disservice to your employer.
HAVING PROBLEMS WITH MATTERS OF YOUR HEART? EMAIL FRANKLIN HERE FOR ALL THE ANSWERS.
artid
1247
Old Image
5_8_franklin.jpg
issue
vol 5 - issue 08 (apr 2003)
section
stories