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22 December 2023
TRUE STORIES OF HEROES' BRAVE BATTLES
BRAVE SOUL OF DECEMBER 2001: JACK ASNER
This month we talk with a man who has been burned in love. His story is a common one: man gets on a dating show set on a cruise ship, and finds himself lost at sea and love.
darby: Tell us, Jack, what the hell were you thinking going on Shipmates?
Jack: I thought it would be fun.
d: Had you seen the show before?
J: Of course.
d: Then I have to ask again: what the hell were you thinking? Those shows never end in love!
J: Well, it started out great. We were on a cruse ship to Canada--
d: --Canada?
J: Yeah.
d: Well, there’s the first sign you were getting fucked! I thought the point of a cruise was to go somewhere you couldn’t get to by car?
J: Can I continue?
d: Of course, continue with your ever-so-interesting Love Boat cruise to Canada.
J: The girl they set me up with was really nice. On the first day, she told me about the time she fucked the whole football team. She was a very interesting person. Not to mention the chances of me getting laid just improved 1000%.
Ah, the young. So dumb and full of cum. Jack had no idea yet that this chick was one big nightmare waiting to be unleashed.
J: We were hitting it off pretty well. On day two, we decided to play a sex game.
d: What, like “Daddy’s Got Your Nose”?
J: No. It was like that scene in 9½ Weeks. We licked and ate things off each other.
d: Well, that couldn’t have been healthy.
J: It was supposed to be erotic. I was licking whipped cream off her leg when,..
d: What?
J: I got the whole thing.
d: You lost me. What whole thing?
J: Her leg. She had a prosthetic leg.
d: Good Lord!
J: I freaked out and ran out of the cabin screaming, “I’m sorry! I’m sorry!”
d: Well, sorry it didn’t work out for you, Jack.
J: What do you mean?
d: Well, you didn’t get laid.
J: No, I still got laid.
d: You did it with “hop-along”?
J: No! I did it with some other chick on the ship. That’s how the show works.
d: Ah, you really have seen the show before!
IF YOU HAVE A FEAT OF BRAVERY YOU WOULD LIKE TO SHARE, EMAIL DARBY AT DARBY@TLCHICKEN.COM
BRAVE SOUL OF DECEMBER 2001: JACK ASNER
This month we talk with a man who has been burned in love. His story is a common one: man gets on a dating show set on a cruise ship, and finds himself lost at sea and love.
darby: Tell us, Jack, what the hell were you thinking going on Shipmates?
Jack: I thought it would be fun.
d: Had you seen the show before?
J: Of course.
d: Then I have to ask again: what the hell were you thinking? Those shows never end in love!
J: Well, it started out great. We were on a cruse ship to Canada--
d: --Canada?
J: Yeah.
d: Well, there’s the first sign you were getting fucked! I thought the point of a cruise was to go somewhere you couldn’t get to by car?
J: Can I continue?
d: Of course, continue with your ever-so-interesting Love Boat cruise to Canada.
J: The girl they set me up with was really nice. On the first day, she told me about the time she fucked the whole football team. She was a very interesting person. Not to mention the chances of me getting laid just improved 1000%.
Ah, the young. So dumb and full of cum. Jack had no idea yet that this chick was one big nightmare waiting to be unleashed.
J: We were hitting it off pretty well. On day two, we decided to play a sex game.
d: What, like “Daddy’s Got Your Nose”?
J: No. It was like that scene in 9½ Weeks. We licked and ate things off each other.
d: Well, that couldn’t have been healthy.
J: It was supposed to be erotic. I was licking whipped cream off her leg when,..
d: What?
J: I got the whole thing.
d: You lost me. What whole thing?
J: Her leg. She had a prosthetic leg.
d: Good Lord!
J: I freaked out and ran out of the cabin screaming, “I’m sorry! I’m sorry!”
d: Well, sorry it didn’t work out for you, Jack.
J: What do you mean?
d: Well, you didn’t get laid.
J: No, I still got laid.
d: You did it with “hop-along”?
J: No! I did it with some other chick on the ship. That’s how the show works.
d: Ah, you really have seen the show before!
IF YOU HAVE A FEAT OF BRAVERY YOU WOULD LIKE TO SHARE, EMAIL DARBY AT DARBY@TLCHICKEN.COM
artid
117
Old Image
4_4_fob.swf
issue
vol 4 - issue 04 (dec 2001)
section
stories