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22 December 2023
fphatty: Tell the folks out there what you do.
Karma Chameleon: I circle the world daily and sprinkle my magic karma dust. It brings people what’s coming to them.
f: Kind of like the Tooth Fairy?
KC: Yeah. My outfit looks a lot like hers. I can’t wear it too often though-- taffeta tends to chafe.
f: Has this always been your job?
KC: Pretty much, but not always officially. I used to give little snots around my neighborhood what-for when I was growing up. It wasn’t until my twenties when I was officially instated by the World Powers.
f: So you’ve never done anything else?
KC: Well, the '90s got hectic on account of the Clinton administration and the “thriving” of Microsoft. So I took a hiatus and enjoyed a three-year run as Gaston in Disney’s Beauty and the Beast on Ice.
f: What has been your proudest achievement to date?
KC: That’s a toughy. I’m pretty happy with the job I did on George Lucas. No, wait! Most definitely, my “masterpiece” is the work I did on Jeffrey Dahmer.
f: Have you always gone by the name Karma Chameleon?
KC: There was a little evolution there. I started as “Gonna Get You Gecko,” but then my damn cousin milked that species for all they’re worth!
f: Ah. Geico. I hate those commercials!
KC: Tell me about it. But don’t worry, he’s got his coming. I can’t give any details away but let’s just say rendezvous between young children and small lizards never have happy endings.
f: Yes! And how about a well-placed rash on Kelsey Grammer for his role in the whole campaign.
KC: Perfect! I like you, kid. You’ve got moxie! I’ve gotta go. But before I do, is there anything I can do for you?
f: Let me think. There are so many thorns in my side. What can you do about a bitchy-ass sister who’s allergic to certain fish?
KC: Beautiful! The next time you two go out, take her to Red Lobster. And bring goggles.
Karma Chameleon: I circle the world daily and sprinkle my magic karma dust. It brings people what’s coming to them.
f: Kind of like the Tooth Fairy?
KC: Yeah. My outfit looks a lot like hers. I can’t wear it too often though-- taffeta tends to chafe.
f: Has this always been your job?
KC: Pretty much, but not always officially. I used to give little snots around my neighborhood what-for when I was growing up. It wasn’t until my twenties when I was officially instated by the World Powers.
f: So you’ve never done anything else?
KC: Well, the '90s got hectic on account of the Clinton administration and the “thriving” of Microsoft. So I took a hiatus and enjoyed a three-year run as Gaston in Disney’s Beauty and the Beast on Ice.
f: What has been your proudest achievement to date?
KC: That’s a toughy. I’m pretty happy with the job I did on George Lucas. No, wait! Most definitely, my “masterpiece” is the work I did on Jeffrey Dahmer.
f: Have you always gone by the name Karma Chameleon?
KC: There was a little evolution there. I started as “Gonna Get You Gecko,” but then my damn cousin milked that species for all they’re worth!
f: Ah. Geico. I hate those commercials!
KC: Tell me about it. But don’t worry, he’s got his coming. I can’t give any details away but let’s just say rendezvous between young children and small lizards never have happy endings.
f: Yes! And how about a well-placed rash on Kelsey Grammer for his role in the whole campaign.
KC: Perfect! I like you, kid. You’ve got moxie! I’ve gotta go. But before I do, is there anything I can do for you?
f: Let me think. There are so many thorns in my side. What can you do about a bitchy-ass sister who’s allergic to certain fish?
KC: Beautiful! The next time you two go out, take her to Red Lobster. And bring goggles.
artid
319
Old Image
3_8_karma.swf
issue
vol 3 - issue 08 (apr 2001)
section
stories