PUFFY GUILTY!

Puff Daddy may have dodged the judicial bullet this time, but he still remains guilty. Guilty of shitty music. Guilty of thinking he can rap with that twelve-year-old with a cold voice. Guilty of a shitty clothing line, unless your intent was to look like a low-rent pimp. Guilty of thinking he honestly had a chance with the monumental ass of J-Lo. Guilty of thinking he's all that. Guilty of conspiracy. Conspiracy to con the pop hip-hop fans that he is worthy of their time and money, that Pied Piper of imbeciles. Guilty of fucking up great classic rock songs. Guilty of brain washing Jimmy Page into thinking that Godzilla song was a good idea. You might beat that rap though, considering Jimmy isn't quite right in the head. But the rest is solid, so pack your bags, bitch. It is only a matter of time before we see the end of your ridiculous reign as the King of Undeserved Fame. Maybe after a few years in a crack-induced prison-sex stupor you will have some integrity and a VH1 special leading to your unwelcome comeback. Good luck, asshole.