FEATS OF BRAVERY: DAVE CHAPPELLE

TRUE STORIES OF HEROES' BRAVE BATTLES
BRAVE SOUL OF APRIL 2001: DAVE CHAPPELLE


This month we sit down with Dave Chappelle, star of movies like Half Baked, Con Air, Blue Streak and Screwed.
darby: Could you share one of your very brave moments with our readers?
Dave: Well, I talked back to a cop in Missouri once.
d: Missouri?!?
D: That’s where the brave part comes in. I didn’t know he had been following me for a while.


With “Johnny Law” on his tail, Dave played it cool. A black man in Missouri was suspicious enough.


D: Damn right! He pulled me over in the middle of nowhere for no reason!
d: Being in the middle of nowhere and alone with a white cop is not a good thing.
D: That’s what I’m saying! Do you want me to go on, or do you need to set the scene some more?
d: Thanks, Dave. The gravel on the side of the road was loose and the air was hot and sticky. Continue, Dave.
D: So he pulled me over illegally. He said there was a “clause” that stated he was allowed to do it. So I said, “What clause? The Santa Claus?” Then he told me to spread my cheeks and lift my sack.
d: Yikes!
D: Then he pushed me into his car.
d: Be thankful you didn’t have any contraband on you.
D: Well, that’s when he found the bag of marijuana.
d: Yikes!
D: He was like, “I knew it! I caught a drug dealer from New York City!” I said, “Drug dealer? It’s a fuckin’ nickel bag! The street value is like 38 cents!” He said, “How do I know you’re not going to sell it?” I said, “Shit, I’ll smoke this shit right in front of you if you want me to!”
d: Did you smoke it?
D: No. But I did get to go for a ride in a police car. They ride pretty smooth.


Thanks, Dave, for taking the time to share your heroic tale. I hope all our loyal readers learn from your story. The next time “The Man” tries to pull you over, press on the gas and drive like hell, because it’s not worth getting your sack lifted!


IF YOU HAVE A FEAT OF BRAVERY YOU WOULD LIKE TO SHARE, EMAIL DARBY AT DARBY@TLCHICKEN.COM