WATER AEROBICS

Do I get to do water aerobics with old people? That would be so cool! What about synchronized swimming? Is there a synchronized swimming team? I could get a sweet floatational Evel Knievel suit with sparkly shit all over it! I could be the star of the team! I bet if I trained these old people really hard, we could get a traveling show together! We could play Vegas, and eventually (if the old people didn't die) we could be world famous! Is synchronized swimming an Olympic sport? I bet we could kick the Olympic team's ass, and then we would go and totally rule the Olympic games! Man, we would be so famous! We could strategically place cannons to shoot the old people in some crazy air formation into the pool. Hopefully there wouldn't be any mid-air collisions! Seeing a bunch of old people in cheesy synchronized swimming outfits get shot out of cannons and then smack into each other in mid-air would be pretty funny. But I would need them to catch me when I get shot out of my cannon. After landing in the pool, they would have approximately five seconds to form a twenty-foot floating pyramid to catch me when I got shot out of my cannon in my badass sparkly jumpsuit. And then, of course, we would do our mind-bogglingly cool routine. How cool is that? Well, maybe I got carried away. It would be cool, though.