WOMEN'S SUFFRAGE AT ALL-TIME HIGH!

I was watching the news last night and was sickened by what I heard. It was reported that women’s suffrage is at a record-breaking high this year. More women are coming out in support of the issues. People, this is not a good thing! Women need to get out while they still can.
wayne: darby, what are you saying? That women should leave the country?
darby: Well, I wouldn’t go that far, wayne! I mean, if they felt they really had to, I’m sure they could just drive to Canada.
w: That’s a powerful statement. I can’t believe you’re serious.
d: Oh, I’m dead serious, wayne! We need to let our female readers know that it’s okay to give up. It’s alright if you can’t take the responsibility anymore.
w: Wow! I’m speechless. We’re talking about women’s suffrage, right?
d: Yes! It’s got to stop! Do we really want our kids to grow up seeing this abuse of power?
w: You’ve lost your goddamn mind! Your reports have always been a little out there, but this takes the cake.
d: What are you talking about? These people are sick. They need to know they don’t have to stay; they can go elsewhere and be happy.
w: Okay. Well it looks like this didn’t work out the way we had planned. We thought, being November, our readers would want some insight to this year’s elections. But it just wasn’t in the cards, I guess.
d: What do the elections have to do with men beating their wives?
w: What? You were suppose to write about women’s suffrage!
d: Right. And how it’s okay to get out of an abusive relationship.
w: darby, women’s suffrage is a woman’s right to vote, not spousal abuse.
d: Oh. Well, I didn’t write anything on that.
w: Good work, darby.