KARMA IS A BITCH

The cool fall weather is usually fair to me. I enjoy the crispness that comes with chilly air and falling leaves. But today, nothing was going right. I had an argument with a good friend earlier. The kind of argument where afterwards, you try to figure out how it got so out of hand. You regret it, but it’s too late. What was said was said and an apology would only seem trite and ineffective. I had upset my friend and my actions would have a distinctly negative effect on the rest of her day. And this is where karma stands up and smacks me down like an enraged stepfather to a red-haired bastard son. I come home to find my new, $2000 computer won’t start up properly. Shit. I ask a friend to look at it and my karmic paranoia tells me that he thinks I’m only using him for his technological know-how. I do appreciate the help, but like the apology, a “thank you” doesn’t seem to be enough. He can’t fix the computer. Shit. I grab the cordless phone to dial the 800 warrantee number. Ten minutes into the recorded menu options, the cordless goes silent. Dead battery. Shit. I find my cell phone, which only works in a certain spot outside on my porch, and redial the number. Just as I begin to talk to a “real” person, the cell goes dead. My signal faded. Shit. I use my roommate’s extension to finally get through, but by this time the repair shop that I’m referred to is closed, and they don’t have an answering machine. Shit. Karma is a bitch. The girl I argued with had a birthday this Saturday. The guy I asked to fix my computer has a birthday today. I went to the bank to get some cash so as to buy them something nice; a gift to express my appreciation for their friendship. The ATM machine spit my card back out at me and gave me the finger. “You ain’t got no fucking money!” appeared in bright green glowing letters on the screen. A receipt flung out at me stating that my account was $894.79 overdrawn. Shit. Take this story to heart, kids. What you do in life comes back to you threefold. Even the little things. So try and do it the way you would want it done to you.