FREAK FILMS: JOE CHRIST'S MY STRUGGLE

Like any living Christ, Joe has a mission. It’s the very thing that drives him to travel the United States armed with little more than his movie catalogue, a few CDs, and a yearning for White Castle. Joe Christ wants to offend you. He’s no bigot, either-- he wants to offend everyone equally, regardless of race, color or creed. Plain and simple, offensive material is this sculptor’s Play-Doh. Also, like any good Christ, his work isn’t appreciated by everyone. Could it be the self-mutilation and blood imbibing in Communion In Room 410? Perhaps it was the gruesome body modification in Sex, Blood And Mutilation. Or the “love scene” in Amy Strangled A Small Child. If these films only left you drooling and starving for more, then Joe Christ’s fourth coming, My Struggle, is just the morbid morsel you’ve been craving. As Christ himself put it, “It has a little something to offend everyone.” My Struggle is the story of a hapless tourist (Cindy Basden) who, knocking on the wrong door for assistance, finds herself bound and habitually raped by an Amish drug dealer (Andy Miller) in an attempt to better the Amish gene pool. It is also the tale of her retarded sister (Tanya Bodnar), sitting alone at home in a cardboard box in the basement, unceremoniously coated in her own feces. As if that wasn’t enough to peak your interest, Christ himself plays The Artist, a war vet who fails to sell any of his penguin paint-by-number paintings, turning to making pipe bombs for high school kids to pay the rent. And, as Joe Christ likes to put it, they each cross paths on a “collision course with wackiness.” Christ’s magnum opus was screened at Monkey’s Retreat, albeit to a crowd consisting of debbie, myself and some other guy who left before viewing Amy Strangled A Small Child. Though viewer turnout was disappointing, it detracted nothing from our viewing pleasure. Since none of you bastards were there, you can always visit Joe’s website to order your own copy or copies of any of his older masterpieces. Also keep an eye out for That’s Just Wrong, his next project, featuring footage of the guy who let him use Georgia State’s editing room getting arrested for child molestation. Perhaps I’ll be offended yet.