OF GARBAGE MEN AND MASKS

Just because the gentleman's code of conduct admonishes against socking our bespectacled brethren, one should not assume all men are in fact “gentlemen.” Of course, one should also not assume everyone can see your spectacles underneath a latex novelty monster mask. Furthermore, be forewarned that garbage men do not generally have all of their senses about them at 5:00 AM, and are frequently noted for their tendency to overreact when startled. Perhaps startled does not adequately describe the state one is in when they are attacked by a juvenile delinquent jumping out of a trash can donning a cut up sheet and a werewolf mask. Similarly, excruciating pain is poor nomenclature for the emotional and physical exuberance associated with having a 300-pound strong-man whack one upside the head with a steel snow shovel. Regardless, if you are about to engage in a melee over a dame, or are placing yourself in the position of possible danger, play it safe and remove your glasses. Boggle, Life and Trouble are games. Eyes are not.