THE THING

John Carpenter's The Thing is one of my favorite movies and easily Carpenter's best film. Yeah, yeah; Halloween, Smalloween. Shut up! Naturally, I chubbed up when I heard that Konami was making a game based on the movie, and couldn't wait to get my dick skinners on the PlayStation 2 version. As Blake, you are the leader of a military rescue team sent to find out what the fuck happened to MacReady and the gang. The cool thing about this game is the squad-based game play. As leader, it is your responsibility to retain the trust of your fellow militants, in order to accomplish various tasks throughout the game. Like the movie, anyone could be The Thing. You get all kinds of weapons, and in the event that some jittery kook won't do what you want, give him the security of a firearm. Or just point your gun to his head and he'll straighten right the fuck up. That's what I do. If he happens to "Thing out" on you, torch him like a love letter in the woods. But be careful; in his flaming Harvey Fierstein scream fit, he may try to take you down with him. Overall, I liked this game. It has great gore and a high violence factor, perfect for kids. But I would've liked to have heard more of Carpenter's trademark musical score, and the space between save points on some levels is maddening.