WEIRTON, WV - A local eastside man played a cruel joke on Shemp-- his golden retriever-- during a recent romp in the park, when he pretended to throw a ball. He'd palmed the item instead, sending Shemp on a luckless search that lasted nearly a half-hour.

"I thought he would have figured it out before too long," said Kevin Robbins of his faithful dog. "I would never be able to forgive myself if he hadn't come back."

Shemp could not be reached for comment.