COTTON JACKSON

Michael, Latoya, Jermaine, Tito, and Janet. You know who these people are, don’t you? Of course you do. They’re the Jacksons. But they can all fuck off! They don’t have shit on Cotton Jackson. Straight out of the backwoods (from behind the outhouse), Cotton Jackson has been belting out hilarious bluesy country twang for years now. Haven’t heard of them yet? Where in the sam hill have you been? Made up of the Jacksons (Cletus, Jackson “Cotton”, Percy, Marv, and Splendid), this band has been spreading their love for years now. And luckily for me, they’re fans of tastes like chicken. So when they contacted me about putting on a private show for me and a few fellow staffers, I was fired up. They were ironing out some new material for their forthcoming album, and we were their musical guinea pigs. Damn. Did you all miss something pretty. Or should I say, “purdy”? In all honesty, they cannot be described. Sure, I could throw around musical comparisons to Hank Williams, or lyrical comparisons to Tenacious D. But fuck, man, it’s all that and more. I mean, you cannot sit through a song called “Sit Down, Shut Up, And Look Pretty” and not laugh your ass off. Other gems from the upcoming album include, “Pedophile” and “Lord Turned My TV On” which features opera singers. No shit. You read that right: opera singers. And if you’re not yet sold on Cotton Jackson, take a listen to “State Fair” which showcases the sweet-ass chorus: “I Tilt-A-Whirl, and Whack-A-Mole, and walk my invisible dog.” Word around the Cotton Jackson campfire is that The Ohio State Fair is optioning it for their official song for 2004. So jump on the back of this pick-up truck before these hillbillies move to Beverly. Hills that is. From June through August, Cotton Jackson is taking their talents overseas for their European “Uninvited Hostel Tour”. But they’ll be back in the states this fall for a nationwide “Uninvited Truckstop Tour”. Cotton Jackson has the potential for all you hipsters out there to say you knew them back when. Just remember your good ol’ buddy Wayne told yer ass about them first.
VISIT COTTON JACKSON HERE.