WEB EXCLUSIVE: MALIBU'S MOST WANTED

Yo, did I ever get lucky this week! I thought I missed seein\' dat Eminem movie based on all the shit he hadda go through to git famous and shit. See, I was in the hospital, feel me? I was all like recovering from this gunshot wound to my penis, \'cause I was all like shovin\' my gat into my waistband all ghetto-style (like Wesley Snipes in New Jack City-- that\'s so dope!) and shit, but guess what, dog? It was still playin\'! I couldn\'t believe it! I was all like thinking the name o\' the flick was sompin\' to do wit numbers and shit, but naw-- it was called Malibu\'s Most Wanted! Man that honky hadda go through some wack shit, yo! Like I didn\'t know he had it so rough livin\' in the \'Bu. But damn, he come a long way. And that shit was funny! I didn\'t know he was so talented! He taught me a lesson, y\'all, fo\' real. It\'s all about how like, you either ghetto o\' you not, dig? Like even these brothas in the movie can\'t fake it! They all like actin\' tough an\' shit, but down deep they ain\'t real! You either down or you ain\'t! An that Eminem man, he fo\' real! Man, I even paid fo\' my baby\'s mama to see that shit (during the day though, when it\'s cheap, \'cause she know I gots to get me some Jujy Fruits). Alright, y\'all. I\'m out-- peace!