From: Jefferson Molter
To: tina_is_the_best@tlchicken.com
Sent: Tuesday, June 22, 2004 11:41 PM
Do you have Shia\'s phone number, mailing address, current pic?
Dear Jefferson,
No, actually, I don\'t. The city of Waukesha has given me my very own phone number and address. And Olan Mills gave me my current picture.
Thanks for asking, though!
TTFN,
- Tina Peters, High Priestess of Shianetics
From: Shiababy2134@cs.com
To: tina_is_the_best@tlchicken.com
Sent: Sunday, June 27, 2004 3:13 PM
Subject: Hey
Hey. Did u ever meet Shia LaBeouf? What is his favorite color?
Hey Shiababy2134,
No, unfortunately, I\'ve never really met Shia. There was this one time I had a dream where I was riding a dog that looked like Alec Baldwin through the set of Lizzie McGuire, and these giant orange people were chasing me, trying to eat my brains. Alec Baldwin Dog ran into a catering truck and landed on some other Disney Channel stars, including super-Jewper hottie Shia LaBeouf! In my dream I was, like, way calm and cool. Not like real life. If I would have landed on Shia in real life I\'d probably spend about ten minutes, like, freaking out and stuff. Then, once I stopped screaming, things would get a little PG-13.
Thanks for writing!
- Tina Peters, Shianasaurus Rex
From: Breena W.
To: tina_is_the_best@tlchicken.com
Sent: Sunday, July 04, 2004 12:27 AM
Subject: Shia, duh.
Hi Tina,
My first question is, are you real? I mean, are you really who you say you are on the \"Shia Is Awesome\" page or is this just a joke? Because, of course, we all know it\'s quite possible Wayne\'s mailbox would be flooded with Shia questions, because Shia is just the bomb. But anyway, if you are the girl to go to with questions, I have one. Does Shia smoke? I have heard that he does and that is really not cool if it\'s true and I need to know because he is Louis Stevens for crying out loud and I don\'t care if he is old enough to make his own decisions, smoking is the ugliest, nastiest habit ever and he should know better. Okay. Thanks and good night.
- Breena
Dear Breena,
Uh, what do you mean, \"Am I real?\" Does everybody love Raymond? As for Shia smoking, I dunno. It\'s a disgusting habit, but I wouldn\'t get all crazy and call it the \"ugliest, nastiest habit ever.\" I mean, have you ever seen a Cleveland Steamer?
Banned in three states (for being so damn cute!),
- Tina Peters, Professor of Shianometry
Send your awesome Shia questions to tina_is_the_best@tlchicken.com.