PHIL COLLINS' HEAD TERRORIZES VILLAGE

ZIMBABWE, AFRICA - Sightings of popular recording artist Phil Collins' giant head hovering over an African village on the outskirts of Zimbabwe have increased recently, causing a panic amongst the villagers.
"Eetsa happen again soon! Click, click!" explains Chief Motububinks. "Wesa can feel it coming in the airsa tonight. Red glow fallsa over the-- click-- villagesa. Wesa fear he judging us. Or wants our-- click, click-- virgins. Orsa both!"
Resigned, he sighed, "Eetsa nuther day-- click-- insa paradise."
So far, spears and rocks have had no effect on the lite rock star's ominous, Cabbage Patch Kid-like cranium.
"Wesa peaceful peoples, far from-- click-- Phil Collins' landsa," wondered Chief Mobutu. "Whysa he big-- click-- headsa madsa?"
The United Nations is looking into possibly declaring Phil Collins' head a threat to international security. When asked of possible United States intervention, President Bush retorted, "They got oil?"
Phil Collins' head had no comment, nor has it had any decent songs since leaving Genesis.