EMPLOYEE PRETENDS TO CARE THAT BOSS HAS CANCER

ST. LOUIS, MO - Tech support employee Benjamin Woods, 24, of Demtek Communications recently pretended to give a shit that his boss, Maximilian White, 64, was recently diagnosed with prostate cancer.
The announcement of White\'s diagnosis was made at an impromptu office meeting early Tuesday morning. Reportedly, Woods turned to a fellow co-worker, Janita Banks, 32, and whispered, \"That\'s just horrible. It always happens to the good ones.\"
However, after the meeting was over, he was overhead leaving the meeting room mumbling to himself, \"Good riddance. Hope you die and burn in hell, you fuck.\"
Even with the harsh comment, no disciplinary action is being taken against Woods, as everyone else in the office feels the exact same way.