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22 December 2023
One is a certifiable genius. The other is Vinnie. Together, they are two of the most brilliant inventors in all of Pangaea. Wayne recognized this, and has given them a column to share with you the wonders of their progressive, modern minds.
THIS PART WAS WRITTEN BY #716
Oh, yeah! You damn right! We’re going to the limit! There ain’t no stopping us! It’s the limit or bust, motherfuckers! You feel that wind in your face? When you go to the limit, you go full speed! I’m talking bugs in your teeth, wind burns, full throttle, full tilt, full ride, full steam ahead, full of beans, full of exclamation points, full on! Because it is on! And it’s at the limit!
You see that? That was the point of no return! And we just blasted straight past it! It’s a dot on the horizon behind us! No turning back now! There ain’t no return trip when you’re going to the limit! No one goes to the limit and back. They just go to the limit!
We ain’t taking it to the limit. We’re going to the limit! What do we look like, The Eagles? The Eagles couldn’t stop us! Nothing can stop us! The Philadelphia Eagles couldn’t stop us! You can’t stop when you’re going to the limit! You gotta keep on with the force, don’t stop! Don’t stop \'til you get enough! And to get enough, you gotta go to the limit!
No holding us back! No holds barred! No quarter! No quarter given! No fear! No smoking! No Doubt! No worries, mate! No shirt! No shoes! No service! No limit-- until we get to it! Me and Vinnie! Straight to the limit! That’s where we’re going!
We’re going to the limit!
You see that? That was the point of no return! And we just blasted straight past it! It’s a dot on the horizon behind us! No turning back now! There ain’t no return trip when you’re going to the limit! No one goes to the limit and back. They just go to the limit!
We ain’t taking it to the limit. We’re going to the limit! What do we look like, The Eagles? The Eagles couldn’t stop us! Nothing can stop us! The Philadelphia Eagles couldn’t stop us! You can’t stop when you’re going to the limit! You gotta keep on with the force, don’t stop! Don’t stop \'til you get enough! And to get enough, you gotta go to the limit!
No holding us back! No holds barred! No quarter! No quarter given! No fear! No smoking! No Doubt! No worries, mate! No shirt! No shoes! No service! No limit-- until we get to it! Me and Vinnie! Straight to the limit! That’s where we’re going!
We’re going to the limit!
THIS PART WAS WRITTEN BY VINNIE
Oh! Hello there. Didn’t see you. I was reading my book on Ki, an ancient art of breathing. It helps me relax-- something I really encourage you all to do. Especially if you’re taking a trip, like my understated compatriot and I.
#716 is most definitely correct. We are, indeed, taking a \"trip\", although there really is no physical traveling to be done, since there is no actual physical location. It’s more a state of mind. A state of being. Do you hear dolphins?
This trip of ours, it’s happening as we speak. Forward we go; the cool, gentle breeze of achievement caressing our determined faces; arms spread wide, we embrace our natural fate, inhaling large, triumphant breaths, tasting nature’s very essence. This is the stuff great men have written about. Hemingway’s great hunts. Kerouac’s legendary travels. Crichton’s namby-pamby dinosaur island.
In the distance, I can see it: that golden, cherubic destination. A Xanadu of the mind, body, and soul. My heart swells with a fondness for my former self-- the self who never experienced the absolute brink of human effort. My muscles burn with a sense of accomplishment, and my eyes close in silent meditation. I must remember what my Ki book tells me about breathing. I have been to The Limit, and it is good.
artid
3179
Old Image
7_11_vin716.jpg
issue
vol 7 - issue 11 (jul 2005)
section
stories