SALMON, IDAHO - A local Idaho man was relieved recently when he was informed that he had previously been misdiagnosed for an existing condition. Five months prior, Tyler Monaghan, 34, was diagnosed by his general practitioner as having erectile dysfunction, or \"ED\".
\"I was mortified,\" stated Monaghan about the diagnosis. \"I mean, for years I was hitting hooch left and right. And it wasn\'t casual business, if you know what I\'m saying. I was a first-class, professional trim-tapper.\"
But that lifestyle changed for Monaghan roughly two years ago when he married his wife Karen. Still, the couple agrees that they had no complaints in the bedroom, even during Karen\'s pregnancy.
\"I couldn\'t understand what had happened,\" stated Tyler. \"Karen had the baby, and then, maybe four months later, it was like I was all tapped out.\"
Reluctantly, Tyler saw his doctor, who diagnosed him with erectile dysfunction. However, the Monaghans refused to take the news lying down, and instead began visiting specialists in hopes of finding another explanation for their trouble.
The couple\'s prayers were answered when they went to see specialist Dr. Arie Desalvo.
\"The good news was that their problem was not erectile dysfunction,\" stated Dr. Desalvo. \"However, the bad news was that Mr. Monaghan\'s wife is a fat beast.\"
Desalvo continued, \"I mean, look at her! Her hair is frizzy; she\'s soft around her middle, her arms, her legs, her wrists... you name it! There\'s not one ounce of makeup on her, despite that crop circle of pimples on her chin. I\'d guess this is at least the fourth day in a row that she\'s worn those pink sweatpants, and she\'s wearing Keds for God\'s sake! Keds!\"
Desalvo quickly wrote Tyler a prescription, calling for him to find an attractive woman to sleep with.
The Monaghans are currently separated, pending their divorce, citing Mr. Monaghan\'s repeated filling of his prescription as the reason for their split.