P-SHITTY

Last month I wrote a piece on Puff Daddy. As the last issue went to press, the asshole changed his name to P-Diddy. I'd like to take this opportunity to amend the previous article. Changing your dumbass name to yet another dumbass name won't erase the damage, nor will it excuse you from being complete shit. You still suck. Prince did it, and successfully. Why? Because he has talent, moxie, originality, and the motherfucker is just plain cool. You possess none of those traits and will never possess them, no matter what ridiculous name you choose. So fuck you, P-Diddy, you no talent hack.