Dear Iran, North Korea, China, Tibet, Utah, Laos, and every other country showing signs of defensive aggression and zero cooperation toward the United States of America,

I tried to be diplomatic. I tried to be democratic. Hell-- I even tried to be both Craftmatic and adjustable. But you people just insist on being difficult. Perhaps you’ve never heard the great Bible tale of Bruce Banner. No, of course you haven’t. You are all non-Christian heathens.

Dear Franklin,

I really love my girlfriend, and everything is great except for one thing. She rarely wants to have sex more than once a week. From reading your column on a regular basis, I am fairly certain that you are in fact a man and not a woman pretending to be a man. Therefore, I am sure it is unnecessary to explain why this is a problem. She has joked around and said that with my sex drive, I should have three or four girlfriends. I pretended to laugh. What should I do?

Sweet Jesus! Just when I thought I’d never come up with an idea for my more-than-extremely-late \"Reading Between The Panels\", I come across something so classic and hilarious I can’t help but dork out and write about it!

Toys are expensive. However, when you really want to make a statement, there\'s nothing like a good, old-fashioned maquette. You know, one of those really cool, really delicate, really pricey little statues of one of your favorite animated characters. And since I can never spend enough money on Star Wars, this month’s featured item comes from a great line of maquettes based on the Clone Wars cartoon shorts from Cartoon Network.
Specifically, Gentle Giant Studios\' fetching maquette of everyone’s favorite Jedi Knight, General Obi-Wan Kenobi.