This Phoenix is buttery, meaning their new album, Alphabetical, has a smooth, velvety quality to it. They\'re what I imagine room temperature, rich, sweet-cream butter would sound like if it could sing.

Loyal fans of me, Judas Cow, may not know this, but the folks at tastes like chicken sexually abuse me with a jump rope. Not only that, I\'m also forced to review gems like Richard Simmons Sweats To The Blues. So when I get a disc that is good, it makes my job that much easier. The Only Constant Is Change is that proverbial sunshine on my rainy day.

For the most part, I feel that the one-shot stories being pumped out of the \"Big Two\" (Marvel, DC) every month are loads of horseshit. Occasionally I come across some, however, that have a skillfully-assembled creative team, and within the pages, you can tell that each individual involved genuinely cared for the project they were creating.
Marvel’s series of \"The End\" stories is a chronicle of the last days of various Marvel heroes-- possible swan songs for the characters, if you will. In this series I have found some (albeit little) hope.

Player One: Staff Member #716
(I\'m informative, Bork is nuts. That\'s just how it is.)
Like any form of media, video games can be divided into a number of different genres, some of which are more popular than others. Games can be classified not only by how they are played (action, strategy, racing, etc.), but also by their tone and subject matter. Science fiction is definitely the most popular, with fantasy, horror, martial arts, and sports as distant runners-up.

Sometimes we here at tastes like chicken come up with headline ideas that no story could possibly live up to. Here are some of my favorites. Just imagine what could have been....
- PLUMBER ASKS, \"WHY DIDN’T ANYONE TELL ME MY ASS WAS HANGING OUT?\"
- FORTY-YEAR-OLD MAN OWNS ALL STREISAND AND CHER ALBUMS, LIVES WITH AUNT: \"I\'M NOT GAY!\"
- MILITARY ENLISTMENT DOWN DUE TO FEAR OF DEATH.
- MAN SIMULTANEOUSLY CALLED \"HERO\" AND \"SICKO\" FOR SAVING CHOKING VICTIM BY ADMINISTERING \"THE SHOCKER\".

Howdy-dookie, Americanyousees! As is the case with every appearance I make in this magazine, I have some really bad news. About 5,600 soldiers are being notified-- possibly as you read this-- about possible deployment to Iraq later this year. No, it was not in our initial plan. Unfortunately, somehow, Rumsfeld \"misplaced\" about 3,250 soldiers somewhere in the desert. Don’t that beat all? I had to laugh at that one. I mean, who loses 3,250 humans? Where do you put them? And how do you not find them? So, I had no choice but to call up some more dudes.

Pete Coors-- yes, that Pete Coors-- is running for Senate here in Colorado.
\"What\'s the big deal?\" you\'re probably asking yourself between long pulls on that nightly liter of White Zin. \"Congress has a long history of embracing drunken, loutish behavior.\" (Consider this guy, for instance.)

For me, listening to Ladytron is always like watching an episode of Doctor Who. I put on their albums and my stereo turns into a pint-sized Tardis. I step through the cassette deck door, only to discover that this cover-alled quartet has converted my meager Sony boom box into a dimension-hopping beat machine that\'s roomier than a prom queen on the inside. And with a single push of the \"play\" button, I\'m rocketed off into uncharted galaxies of sound and wonder.