It’s impossible to mention Daredevil without mentioning Frank Miller. Some people think Miller made Daredevil. Most readers don’t realize that Frank started as a penciler working with a writer, and eventually took over both jobs. Yes, he created Elektra. And while he did not create Bullseye, he certainly defined him. Under Miller, DD became the grim and gritty hero of Hell’s Kitchen. A few years ago, moviemaker and comic fan Kevin Smith gave readers his take on ol’ Hornhead with a story arc called “Guardian Devil”. I like this story as well, and recommend it highly.

This month, I’m reviewing the best film about tweakers you never got to see. Last year, Warner Brothers, in their infinite wisdom, chose to barely release this excellent Val Kilmer flick, The Salton Sea. Instead of putting out this gritty film noir tale about an undercover widower out to avenge his wife’s murder by methamphetamine addicts (or “tweakers”), Warner Bros. released and pushed pieces of total shit like FEARdot.com and Kangaroo Jack. The Salton Sea never even made it to a Columbus screen! I should know.

King\'s X is a band who has been around for 20 years, inspiring musicians everywhere, and amassing a loyal cult of followers. Perpetually on the verge of breaking through, King\'s X is a band that anyone could love. To the uninitiated, King\'s X is a three-piece band from Houston, Texas, and features soulful vocals supported by Beatles-esque back-ups over drop-tuned thick riffs. If you\'re familiar with the band, you will recognize their sound as having been lifted and used by bands everywhere (Alice In Chains and Pearl Jam, to name a few).

NOTE: YES, WE KNOW BEN AFFLECK ISN\'T EVEN IN THIS MOVIE. WE JUST LOVE USING PHOTOS OF HIM. SO THERE.
First you need to select a movie from the press screening list you receive each week. In this case, How To Lose A Guy In 10 Days. See? That was easy. As it turns out, the screening for that movie is three days away, so in the meantime just lie around and wait. You may want to watch TV. I recommend Blind Date; it\'s a great way to clear your head of any thoughts that might get in the way of you judging the movie.

Now, shit bitch. I\'ve been saying it for years that Disney is the devil-to-the-izzo. But, I truly want to know what they\'s got on my homie, Steve Martin, yo. He, by far, is one of the tightest actor/comedian/writers of all time. True dat, dog! But good God, my homie does some shitty films sometimes! Damn! Bringing Down the House was one of the biggest pieces of shiz-nit I\'ve ever had to sit through! Brotha got to take a Rolaid just to get through the opening credits! As whack as the movie was, Martin gives an off-the-hook performance. How do these things happen, holmes?

Your alarm blasts you awake at 9:00AM, but you palm-slap the snooze button every five minutes, until 10:15AM. It takes a few seconds for your brain to process the fact that Laura\'s already left for work. You flip back the covers and swing your legs over the side of your well-worn, twin-sized mattress, sitting up in one clunky maneuver. Leftover beer bells and whisky whistles echo through your skull, queasy reminders of each overpriced drink you had at the bar last night. Then it\'s up and to the bathroom.

Look. I’ve been reading for a long time. I love reading; short stories, novels, novellas. Even poetry. Because, despite what I used to think, there IS such a thing as good poetry. Edgar Allen Poe wrote it. Dr. Seuss wrote it. Saul Williams writes it.
A. Young does not.

Doesn\'t anyone out there have an original idea or sound? I swear I\'ve already heard this disc by Hot Rod Circuit (Sorry About Tomorrow) a thousand times already this year. Isn\'t anyone out there sick of hearing the same pseudo-punk bullshit over and over again? I think I\'ll just come up with a form review for all the generic discs that sound like this, because they\'re just wasting everyone\'s time. The review would go something like this:

Another endless day rolls into evening, and I decide to actually make an attempt to go out and be sociable. I’d heard rumor of a decent band playing downtown, so I put on my most appealing youth costume. (I decide to go with the sensitive artist look.) I hit the corner store and drop a couple bucks on a pack of smokes. Not because I’m a smoker, but because they’re nice ice-breakers. Another few bucks gets me in the door of the show. Once inside, I size up the crowd, and decide that I chose the right clothes for the evening. Art school girls litter the floor by the dozens.